Kindly allow me to take you back in mid 90S on one of the best reality game show that ever featured on Kenyan television screens. This famous reality show was featured by Kenya Television Network. (KTN) Hosted by two stupefying people, Martin Mburu and Regina Mutuko. The show was eagerly awaited by millions of Kenyans from all walks of life every Sunday night immediately after the seven O'clock nightly news.
Unless you're a visitor in Jerusalem, by this time you are aware that I am referring to: OMO PICK A BOX show. This was a reality show that left a remarkable memory in the minds of millions Kenyans.
If you're wondering the relationship between this blog's title and a two decades old reality show, the show is just but an analogy. Even though the primary idea of every person who was selected to participant was to settle for the lucky box, both hosts took turn to lure the participant into settling for the highest amount of money that was offered by one host instead of choosing the box.
When the money was offered in plenty, the opposing host could humbly remind the participant that his or her primary objective that saw him or her on the show was to win big from choosing the box. Times without number, the tag of war that contrived a total dilemma between choosing the money or the box could always take the center stage.
In reference to marriage, my question is: What informed you into marrying or getting married to your spouse? Was it the famous phase among vast majority of ladies: A financially stable man? or was it the uncertain probity that could only be manifested through time? In other words, was your decision to marry or get married based on money and material possessions or your prospective spouse integrity and visionary?
From our omo pick a box analogy, how many participants were adamant about choosing the box but got carried away by the amount of money that was offered in place of the box? In the same way, was your reason to marry or get married based on values, personality, character and integrity to begin with and are those the very reasons that have sustained your marriage to this day or your insatiable greed for money contrived a diversion, or did you begin your marriage with ulterior motives?
It's very unfortunate that most marriages in this day and age are founded on the wrong reasons of visible and tangible riches rather than invisible and intangibles values. Even though I am not ignorant of king Solomon's words, 'A feast is made for laughter, and wine makes merry; but money answers everything.' Ecclesiastes 10:19, the love of money is biblically unacceptable. 'For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.' 1Timothy 6:10. Money is a good servant but a bad master. The love of money contrives insatiable greed where marital love is compromised in place of opulence.
Being in a marriage because of money is like taking a job solely because of the salary without a smidgen passion of that job. If you don't have a passion for your job, you can never ever become productive satisfactory. Likewise, if you don't have a passion for your marriage, you can never ever become a productive spouse.
Before you point your finger to your spouse, chances are, you're married to the right person but your ulterior motives are the reason to why your marriage is on the rock. A marriage can only work if husband and wife share mutual interests of serving one another unabatedly. Marriage is a union of servanthood not a master versus a servant.
If you're in marriage to serve each other, you will always find a million reasons to stay married. But if you are in a marriage to get your own interests served without serving the interests of your spouse, you're a selfish person and your marriage won't pass the test of time because of your selfishness.
In that regard, before you point a finger, lay a blame or accuse your spouse because of your failing marriage, first ask yourself this extremely imperative question: Have I been serving my spouse's needs relentlessly?
